I have an older half sister, Judy, who lives in Pennsylvania. She is 5 yrs older than I am and she has a different mother (who by the way, looks exactly like my own mother).
Growing up, I only knew my sister Judy when she would come spend occasional weekends with our family. Her mother and my mother were not great fans of each other, so times spent together, for me at least, were few and far between, but very precious. She was the person I looked up to and admired so much. She wore glasses, which she had to remove when she went to bed, and I thought as a 5 yr old girl, that this was absolutely the coolest thing one could possibly do (now I know better). She was a "hero" to me. She was older, more knowledgable, knew all the songs on the radio and had a beautiful voice. I loved when she came to stay, even though it was generally only a Friday night and Saturday, and then she would return to Allentown from our home in Quakertown. Allentown seemed like a BIG city compared to our small rural town and living in Allentown was the "best" place to be.
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
Being with Judy was just about the most exciting thing that could happen to a little dimpled girl, who thought the sun rose and set on her older sister.
Through the years, our times spent together were sparce. I remember mom crying a lot because of words said by Judy's mom and hearing about the alimony/child support that had to be paid to her mom, which kept us wearing hand me down clothes and dresses made from chicken feed cloth sacks. What I found out years later was that Judy and her mom were just as destitute as we were during those years and many times, Judy was with her grandma, just as we lived with my grandparents often, due to not having the money for rent or food.
When I grew up, Judy had married and had kids. I felt alienated from them because now we lived in Florida and she and her family were still living in Pennsylvania. Summer vacations north would be the only times we would see each other. It was not until I had been through nursing school and then had graduated from college and lived in Minnesota 7 yrs, that Judy and I "reunited" and got very close. She and her husband had divorced and her kids had married. So much time had passed and there was so much "catching up" to do.
What we found in our more frequent visits was that we were very much alike. We shared a love for old musicals (Fred Astaire, Ginger Rogers, Gene Kelly, etc), we both loved "oldies" music from the 50's, and 60's. We also had the same warped sense of humor and spent a great deal of time laughing hysterically. She was a much better card player than I was and would beat me at 500 Rummy well into many nights and early mornings. I loved spending time with my sister. I loved seeing how she "survived" through a divorce (after a rough marriage), then the death of her ex-husband, whom had remained her friend; the slow downward progression of her mother's health (alzheimer), as well as how she remained actively involved in cooking, baking, and caring for others (neighbors, relatives and paramedics) while dealing with numerous, health difficulties herself.
My family nicknamed Judy, the Bionic Woman because almost all her "parts" had been replaced with artificial parts. When she was young, she broke both wrists at the same time; she has had her hips both replaced several times; she has had her shoulders replaced; has had surgery on her ankles, knees, and feet besides having major "organ" surgeries. She is prone to blood clots, infections, and a multitude of other maladies.... and yet, she laughs, and encourages others. During my recent episode with breast cancer, Judy was my greatest supporter. She sent cards and notes all the time and called frequently to allow me to cry, "bitch and moan" about my trials and tribulations, and just, generally, tried to keep me upbeat and positive. She is also a great encouragement where Mesut is concerned. She prays for us; helped me to get a plane ticket (a loan) so I could meet him in person to see if we really did care about each other, when I knew she did not have 2 nickels to rub together herself.
She lives alone in a small subsidized apartment for those who have physical handicaps.... and Judy is one total physical handicap. She has difficulty with mobility, wears a brace on one legs, walks with a walker, but continues to constantly be on the go, even with a car that needs to be buried and won't go into reverse. She cares for her neighbors, cooks for her cousin who lives on a lake in the Pocono Mountains, where Judy loves to spend weeks in the summer. However, her car being near dead, and Judy's health being tedious, trips to visit her cousin are less and less.
About a wk ago Wednesday, I got a call from Judy saying she was in the hospital (again). She has suffered so many falls in her apartment that until recently, she knew the paramedics by name and would cook and bake for them to repay them for coming to her rescue and transporting her to the hospitals. Well, here she was again, in the hospital. She had gotten up to use the restroom in the middle of the night and when she tried to return to bed, her legs would not move, and because of the surgery to her shoulders, she was unable to even lift her legs onto the bed. She waited until about 5:30 a.m. and called her daughter who told her to call the paramedics. They transported her to the hospital in pain as if she had broken or popped out her hip again. Xrays did not show that problem however and she was admitted for tests. What was found was a blood clot behind her knee and what was suspected was a infection in her hip joint. Of course her mood was bleak, but she continued to laugh her contagious laugh and to try to encourage me after I had told her of my exhaustion and pain since returning back to work. I heard nothing more until tonight.
Judy has been depressed and not wanting any communication with family (outside of her kids). She was put on blood thinners for the blood clot and a procedure was done to determine if there was indeed an infection in her leg/hip bones....and there is. She has previously had MRCA but now the culture returned staph. The dr, however, decided the MRCA is what caused her problems this time and why she was totally immobilized with pain. She was to have MAJOR surgery today, but because of the blood thinners, her blood count was too low (clotting time) and they have been giving her plasma to build her up so she could tolerate this reconstructive surgery. What they are going to do is go into her hip and down into her leg to insert antibiotics which will slowly be disbursed over the next 6-8 wks, and then have to be repeated. The drs said that because of the numerous hip surgeries (at least 10) she has had, the bone is almost gone. They will have to rebuild the bones. Her leg will be shorter and she will have to wear special shoes which will even out the difference in her legs.
I feel so horrible for her that my heart is aching. I feel as if a part of me is going through this with her. I have posted on Facebook to try to get people who wrote to me, encouraged me, prayed for me, sent cards, letters, and gifts, to also do the same for Judy. I can only do so much but I want desperately to repay all the love and kindness she has always shown to me. I would love for her to receive cards and encouragement from around the world. If anyone would be interested in mailing cards or notes to her, please let me know and I will either send her address or mine to you and get the cards to her one way or the other. If all you can do is pray, that will be wonderful also. She needs our prayers, our love and our encouragement. She is 65 and her health is not real good....not to endure such extensive surgery, once again.
Judy, my sister, is my best friend in the world. She is my heart and my soul and I love her so very much. Please try to remember her each day and ask God to take care of her, heal her, and be with her doctors. Thank you so much!!!!!!